ArtPartOne

What do you get when you cross a moose with a hog?  (Isn’t that what The Bishop and Brother Mullins are always trying to do out at the National Animal Diseased Vardaman Center?)  Anywho, see the attached pdf.  Imagine Art-O-Rama straddlin’  this fine unit.  . . . or maybe you?


ArtPartTwo

A delightful yet nutritionally-balanced note from the Wonderful World of Art the Barton:

“Don’t forget the “Gala of Spaghetti” event being held Friday, August 22nd to support our Story County Chapter of the American Cancer Society.  Last year the Vardo volunteers had a good time; remember George and Julie’s paper hats!  It would be fantastic to have another great showing of Vardo’s in the kitchen this year!  Sharon Bellinghausen, our kitchen leader, is asking me “Please, can I have those great Vardo’s back again this year!”  (see attached jpg’s)

“But wait, there’s more!  For any Vardo’s needing additional Community Service points that do not plan to enter GAAR I could sure use some "Gala of Pancakes" kitchen help on the morning of August 31st,a Sunday.  Same as last year, the GAAR award ceremony will be held at the Moose amidst a backdrop of pancakes and stuffed Moose heads.” (Editor’s note: Let’s stuff Art and “backdrop” him . .)

“Here is a link to the GAAR entry form:  http://www.greatamesadventurerace.org/2008_GAAR_brochure.pdf”

“If Vardos want/can/could/will help with either of these events please email me at a.barton@mchsi.com Thanks!”


Team Vardo – Ames Area Running Club Merger?

The rumors are true.  We have CitibankSmithBarney handling the due diligence, and the boys down at the Nyemaster firm are crafting the legal crapola.  Jimmy Carter is on call to mediate the name of the merged entity.  We hope to trade beads and beaver pelts and smoke peace pipe long time.  Advice:  Sell short and stay tuned.

Next Issue of the VardoGram

Hey, can one of you clowns send out the VardoGram next Tuesday for me?  I’ll be riding on some crazy Habitat for Humanity 500 mile bike ride up in Minnesota.   Click here:  http://www.habitat500.org/    I’d like to suggest having a man of Vardo handle the VardoGram duties next week, because if you let some dang woman do it, the VardoGram will be all touchy-feely, and nicey-nice, and that type of crap.  Things like, “oh, aren’t Natalie’s new shoes just soo cute?” and “oh, isn’t Nurse Franken just the nicest person” and blah blah blah . .. . You don’t want that crap. You want meat. And the VardoGram is 100% pure Angus.  Hell, we’re Black Bull.  We’ve got the biggest . . . . horns. 


Group Runs / Activities This Week

Monday:        See Laura Judge and the new fashions for Fall at JAX Outdoors.  Ask for the Team Vardo discount. You won’t get it. But ask.
Tuesday:       5:30 PM Group Run – Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts 
Wednesday:   Use your VardoBoy anywhere, anytime. Even during boring meetings when everyone's texting below the conference table.
Thursday:      5:30 PM Group Run – Dublin Bay.  Food and drinks on the patio to follow. Surely someone will bring a route . . .. .
Saturday:       Group Run TBA.  Your RouteMaster: The Other Bill aka Judge Bill aka that wacko Hy-Vee TriGuy aka (insert whatever)
Saturday:       Midnight Warren Q. Madden Vardaman Madness
Sunday:         Chamois Butt’r Madness . .. .Oh.My.God.