Hey, Tiger! Hey, Arnie! Do you have a golf cart (or know someone who has
one?) Art the Barton could use some carts on September 7th for an event at
Ada Hayden Heritage Park (see attached pdf) . Contact Sir Barton at:
a.barton@mchsi.com

Speaking of Art The Barton

Where's that cat been lately? Well, check out the attached JPG "ArtAward".

And Yet Another Fine Item From A The B (Have The Women, Methodists, And
Small Children Leave The Room)

This is a strictly mathematical viewpoint...it goes like this:

What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about
those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have al l been to
those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100% How about achieving
103%? What makes up 100% in life?

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these
questions:

If:

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

is represented as:

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

Then:

H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K

8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

and

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E

11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But ,

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E

1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

And,

B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T

2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.

A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G

1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that while hard work and
knowledge will get you close, and attitude will get you there, it's the
bullshit and ass kissing that will put you over the top.

Group Runs / Activities This Week

Tuesday: 5:30 PM: Group Run - Vardaman Center for the Performing
Arts. (South Entrance - City Hall)
Wednesday: Post run rituals: Ice bath (Brother Mullins) / Deep tissue
massage (Kori) / Farm-fresh, certified organic doobie (Mary)
Thursday: 5:30 PM Group Run - Ada Vardaman Heritage Memorial Warren
Q. Madden Therapeutic Panasonic Pomerantz Park
Friday: 5:30 PM ACS 5K for Life Spaghetti Palooza - Moose
Lodge. Featured Artist: Hats By Klotzbach
Saturday: All day event: Russ Laczniak's Birthday. Celebrate it
with your favorite goat.
Saturday: Group Run RouteMaster: Greg Wool
Saturday: American Cancer Society 5K Run / Walk for Life - Brookside
Park, right here in Ames, IA USA
Sunday: There's nothing here about Art. Why are you still reading
this?