Hey Vardos,

I have safely returned to land, although I am pretty sure I am swaying as I write this and I am almost positive the bed in my hotel room moved up and down all morning (it’s San Francisco – who knows what goes on here). Anyway, I have a random request. Is anyone a subscriber to Outside Magazine? I need to get my hands on the January issue.

I will hopefully be at the group run on Thursday, where I will make my triumphant return to running with potentially a whole lap around the north basin at ada hayden. (Bacon detox began today)

And FYI, there is an REO Speedwagon Way in Champaign Illinois. Maybe the Bradshaws will do an honorary run along it on Wednesday.

Art Barton Status Report

No mention in the Ames Police Department or Story County Sheriff Department reports in The Tribune.  Jonathan Evans,  MI-5 Director General, stated in his weekly security briefing: “Though we have no confirmed sightings of Mr. Barton, he currently poses no danger to Ames and the area proximate to the Moose Lodge.”


Routes For Tuesday’s Group Run.  Behold The Bill and The Jan Schmitt:

Route options follow for Tuesday night; mileages are posted as 10 and 4. Run one or both routes for the 10.  Water/Gatorade will be available in cooler at City Hall.  

6 mile Moore Park http://www.usatf.org/routes/view.asp?rID=247404

West on 5th to Main across Grand
North on Northwestern to 24^th
West on 24th into Moore Memorial Park, water available at fountains
South out of Park by Veenker Golf Course to Stange
Stange to 13th
13th to Clark
Clark to City Hall

4 mile route http://www.usatf.org/routes/view.asp?rID=247414

West on 5th to Main across Grand
North on Northwestern to 24^th
West on 24th to Hayes
South on Hayes to Ridgewood
South on Ridgewood to 13^th
13th to Clark
Clark to City Hall


How Do The Duke and Duchess Of Ferndale (Sir Craig Walter and Lady Kori Heuss) Clean House?

Why, with The World’s Largest Dust Bunny – of course!





























Group Runs / Activities This Week

Tuesday:         5:30 PM  Group Run.  Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts -  Your RouteMasters:  The Jan &The Bill Schmitt
Wednesday:    5:45 PM VardoCycle – Meet at the Pizza Ranch on East 13^th St.
Wednesday:    Today might be a good day to enjoy a mullet moment.    Serving suggestion:  REO Speedwagon
Thursday:        5:30 PM Group Run – Ada Vardaman Hayden Heritage Warren Q. Madden Attorney-In-Fact Park
Saturday:        Group Run.  Your RouteMaster:  Diesel Dave Elsenbast

Sheer genius.  Professor Schultz, you must take over the writing and editing of the VardoGram.  The torch shall pass.

gjk

Engaging?  Yes, that's the idea. I enjoy engaging with the world around me and engaging in lively discussion. I sometimes engage in a good party and sometimes nothing can engage me to liveliness. I have, however, been fortunate enough to engage with the lovely Dr. Erin Pederson of the ISU Pedersons. 

“Even now we should engage ourselves in such actions that lead to national development, growth and progress. ” - George Klotzbach

Thanks and have a happy and engaging day,

Tom

Congratulations on your engagement!

Hillary

Engaging?  Yes, that's the idea. I enjoy engaging with the world around me and engaging in lively discussion. I sometimes engage in a good party and sometimes nothing can engage me to liveliness. I have, however, been fortunate enough to engage with the lovely Dr. Erin Pederson of the ISU Pedersons. 

“Even now we should engage ourselves in such actions that lead to national development, growth and progress. ” - George Klotzbach

Thanks and have a happy and engaging day,

Tom

Professor Tom Schultz Shall Now Engage Us With A Public Announcement

The following space has been reserved for the most engaging Professor Schultz, who offers up this fine nugget of timely VardoNews.
Professor Schultz, the microphone is yours:
                                                                                                                                                                                                             

A Distress Call From Danielle, Somewhere Off The Coast Of Somalia

“I would like to report that sea lions are the creepy heavy breathers of the ocean world. They lurk around the boat in the dark, only making their presence known with their heavy breathing. I haven’t run since March!  And there is bacon for breakfast EVERY SINGLE DAY. This might be very bad.”    Danielle “Imelda” Wain

(Editor’s Note:  Is it possible that Mr. Delaney’s ancestors were sea lions?  Discuss.)


Ron Mowers:  A) Animal, B) Vegetable, or C) Mineral

The correct answer would be “A”, Animal.


And Now:  An Important Economic Stimulus Message From The Vardo

“One of the Team 12.4ers sent me this link for a smokin' deal on a Garmin 305:”

http://www.bestbuy.com/site/olspage.jsp?id=pcat17005&type=page&tab=1&_requestid=695405


Route for Saturday’s Group Run.  Ladies and Gentlemen, Behold The Laczniak’s:

The course for Saturday is in the attached link.  We will start at our house (818 Idaho Ave) at 7:30 am.  Per the instructions of the Vardo gods, we have set up one 13-mile run (actually, it is 13.1, so runners can feel like they are doing a half marathon).  But, if some runners want to run less, they can simply adjust it to their liking (for example, runners can cut out the Ada Hayden loop to make it a 10-mile course).  Our friends, Tom and Helen Brennan have graciously allowed us to put water in a cooler in their driveway (3712 Hoover).  This should accommodate runners at about the 4.5 and 8 mile marks.  Bathrooms are available at the Ada Hayden Park.  We will also have some water and Gatorade at the start and finish of the run.  

http://www.usatf.org/routes/view.asp?rID=285171

The course starts at our house and heads north to Ontario and then swings east on Ontario until Stange Road, where it turns north to 30^th street.  It then heads east until 30^th merges with Top-O-Hollow, where it continues east until Hoover Avenue.  It then turns north on Hoover to the Ada Hayden Park and includes the lower loop around the lake.  The course the returns to Hoover where it proceeds south until 24^th Street.  It turns south on Hayes and goes toward Ames High.  After passing the Ames High Practice Fields (everyone give the soccer teams a wave during their respective practices), the course takes the “Ames High Trail” west.  It ends in the Schilleter Village parking lot (technically, it’s called Bruner Drive).  The course continues east toward Stange Road.  Upon hitting Stange, the course turns south until Ontario.  At Ontario, it turns west and heads back toward the Spring Valley area and the Laczniak House.  See you Saturday.  Russ and Kathy Laczniak

So You Think You Have It Rough?

Here’s how I had to do term paper research back in the eighties at UNI:





























Group Runs / Activities This Week

Tuesday:         5:30 PM  Group Run.  Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts -  Your RouteMaster:  Bill (The Other) Pattinson
Wednesday:    Friends, today is Sister Kirstin Peterson’s birthday.  So sing along:  Five. Five Dollar. Five Dollar Foot Long.
Wednesday:    The IRS loves you this I know, for the Tax Code tells me so.
Thursday:        5:30 PM Group Run – Ada Vardaman Hayden Heritage Warren Q. Madden Fluticasone Propionate Park
Saturday:        Group Run.  Your RouteMasters:   The Laczniak Klan, featuring Joey The Goat

Routes For Tuesday’s Group Run From Former Professional Trampoline StuntWoman, Sara Lehman

Meet at Community Center.  Mileage choices:  3, 4.5 or 9 
3 miles:  http://www.usatf.org/routes/view.asp?rID=203254       4.5 and 9:  http://www.usatf.org/routes/view.asp?rID=121558 
(9 miles - do the second loop  twice)      There will be water at the Community Center. 


A Message Forwarded By Mary, Queen of 16^th Street

“I am in need of female runners without a history of stress fracture and female runners without a history of overuse injury that has kept them out of training more than 1 week for subjects.  If you know of any, pass on my name. As before, I am willing to answer any injury or running questions. Thanks, Stacey”

Stacey Meardon, PT, ATC, CSCS     PhD Candidate
Iowa State University Department of Kinesiology
283 Forker Building
Ames, IA  50011
515-294-2943 (office)
515-556-6437 (cell)


Here’s How We Moved Father Fencl And Sister Goodman

Group Runs / Activities This Week

Tuesday:         5:30 PM  Group Run.  Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts -  Your RouteMaster:  Sara Q.Lehman  (per above)
Wednesday:    Today is the day to process the inbox to zero, get the action support folder, and move some issues to your hard landscape.
Thursday:        5:30 PM Group Run – Ada Vardaman Heritage Warren Q. Madden I’ll Have A Fat Tire Park
Saturday:        Group Run.  Your RouteMaster:   Sister Goodman

Fresh From The Epplin-Mowers Factory:  Routes For Tuesday’s Group Run  

“Here are the routes for Tuesday.  Both start at City Hall.  We will put water/Gatorade in the Vardo area behind the sign on the NW corner of 24^th and Stange.”

8.4 mi route:  www.usatf.org/routes/view.asp?rID=283474                      
6.3 mi route:  www.usatf.org/routes/view.asp?rID=283470

Margaret & Ron


Book Signing This Week at Borders Features Local Author

From the back cover:  “A hilarious adventure through Mexico with Team Vardo’s favorite Moose – Art Barton.”

Group Runs / Activities This Week

Tuesday:              5:30 PM  Group Run.  Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts -  Your RouteMaster:  Sir Ron Mowers and Lady Margaret Epplin  (per above)
Tuesday:              HydroWoman Hillary Olson’s birthday
Wednesday:      Group Move – Our Lady of Vardo Church relocation (3722 Ross Road to 1425 Maxwell Ave.)  Father Fencl suggests a 4:30 PM start time.
Wednesday:      Hey look – it’s Cori Peterson’s birthday
Thursday:            5:30 PM Group Run – Ada Vardaman Heritage Warren Q. Madden Gretsch Malcolm Young Double Humbucker Park
Friday:                  A woman should never tell her age.  Unless today happens to be the day Dawn Howerton turns 50.
Saturday:             Group Run.  Your RouteMaster:   Erik Roys