Team Vardo News

RE: VardoGram

2010-02-09T14:08:00.000-06:00

Thank you all for the laughs you give me. We all need them right now because I’m very sick of this snow and anybody says one more time but this is a pretty snow and mesmerizing snow I’m going to puke in their yard so it will not be a pretty mesmerizing snow any longer!

From: m m [mailto:michaelamullins@hotmail.com]
Sent: Tuesday, February 09, 2010 2:06 PM
To: George Klotzbach; Adam Foley; Amy Hutchison; Andrew Ryder; Art Barton; Barbara Wheelock; Anderson, Benjamin R; Beth Henriksen; Bill Schmitt; Bob Watson; Brendan Finn; Carver Nebbe; Chris Delaney; Christine Keenan; Cori Peterson; Craig Walter; Danielle Wain; Dave Elsenbast; Deborah Martinez; Del Weiss; Don Muff; Eric Esser; Erik Roys; Erin Pederson; Wurtele, Eve [GDCBS]; George J. Klotzbach; Greg Wool; Heather Greenlee; Hillary Olson; Jamile Shirley; Jan L Schmitt; Jeff Margrett; Jeffrey Bradshaw; Jenn Schaeffer; Jennifer York; Jody Gatewood; John Moran; Jonathan Wendel; Hagley, Joyce A [HD FS]; Julie Vardaman; Karen Klotzbach; Kathy Laczniak; Katie Bradshaw; Katie Larsen; Kecia Goodman; Kimberly Donner; Kirsten Peterson; Kori Heuss; Kris Franken; Laura C Merrick; Linda Lehman; Lisa Lann; Lisa Wehr; Margaret Epplin; Margaret Epplin (Home); Mary Schrunk; Megan Colvin; Mike Clayton; Mike Wheelock; Natalie Welter; Nicole Arnold; Paul Kallio; Randy Foster; Randy Sacco; Bundy, Richard [ISFND]; Roman Lynch; Ron Mowers; Russ Laczniak; Rusty Hutchison; Sara Lehman; Skunk River Cycles; Stacey Roberts; Stephanie Cutler; Steve Bobenhouse; Tiffany Butler; Moran, Timothy E; Tim Rasmussen; Timothy Fencl; Timothy Gartin; Tom Schultz; William Pattinson
Subject: RE: VardoGram

In answer to Mr. George's inquiries:

1. Yes, I did appear topless in Playgirl. I was young and I needed the cash last week.

2. Katie, mail me your copy and I'll autograph it for you. Thanks for being a loyal subscriber.

3. The vest represents Missouri's take on the term "six-pack abs". It's a concealable and wearable cooler loaded with Budweiser tallboys. Fitting perfectly underneath an oversized trenchcoat, Baby Bjorn, or bedazzled holiday sweater, the Six Pack Buddy (TM) is great for smuggling some brews in to your next office meeting, religious fesitval, or court appearance. Need a few drinks to make it through your day? Need a few more? Then you need the Six Pack Buddy!

But wait, there's more! Order now and you'll receive Rectarettes, our convenient new concealable cigarette case. Next time they tell you "No Smoking", you can tell them "Up Yours!" with Rectarettes.

3. I just patented the heck out of that idea, so HANDS OFF.

Yours,

Billy Mays Jr. (time to regrow that beard...)

Mrs. Dr. Jeff (Katie) Bradshaw Asks: Is This Brother Mullins?

RE: VardoGram

2010-02-09T14:05:00.000-06:00

Mrs. Dr. Jeff (Katie) Bradshaw Asks: Is This Brother Mullins?

RE: VardoGram

2010-02-09T13:16:00.000-06:00

I’ll be taking a spin on the dreadmill this evening at ARFC north if any vardo’s who don’t feel like braving the blizzard care to join me. I’ll be there around 5:30 and am up for 5 miles, with possibly a 10 minute warm up on the bike or elliptical (depending on how busy the place is) and a round of pull ups, push ups and abs to finish.

Have a good one all!!! May the force be with you all!

Sister KP

Kirstin K. Peterson

Confidentiality Notice: This electronic mail transmission may have been sent on behalf of Iowa Subway Development, Inc. It may contain information that is confidential, privileged, proprietary, or otherwise legally exempt from disclosure. If you are not the intended recipient, you are hereby notified that you are not authorized to read, print, retain, copy or disseminate this message, any part of it or any attachments, and that you must not take any action in reliance of it. If you have received this message in error, please delete it and any attachments from your system without reading the content and notify the sender immediately of the inadvertent transmission. There is no intent on the part of the sender to waive any privilege that may attach to this communication. Thank you for your cooperation.

From: George Klotzbach [mailto:vardogram@gmail.com]
Sent: Tuesday, February 09, 2010 10:42 AM
To: Adam Foley; Amy Hutchison; Andrew Ryder; Art Barton; Barbara Wheelock; Benjamin Anderson; Beth Henriksen; Bill Schmitt; Bob Watson; Brendan Finn; Carver Nebbe; Christopher Delaney; Christine Keenan; Cori Peterson; Craig Walter; Danielle Wain; Dave Elsenbast; Deborah Martinez; Del Weiss; Don Muff; Eric Esser; Erik Roys; Erin Pederson; Eve Wurtele; George J. Klotzbach; Greg Wool; Heather Greenlee; Hillary Olson; Jamile Shirley; Jan L Schmitt; Jeff Margrett; Jeffrey Bradshaw; Jenn Schaeffer; Jennifer York; Jody Gatewood; John Moran; Jonathan Wendel; Joyce Hagley; Julie Vardaman; Karen Klotzbach; Kathy Laczniak; Katie Bradshaw; Katie Larsen; Kecia Goodman; Kimberly Donner; Kirstin Peterson; Kori Heuss; Kris Franken; Laura C Merrick; Linda Lehman; Lisa Lann; Lisa Wehr; Margaret Epplin; Margaret Epplin (Home); Mary Schrunk; Megan Colvin; Michael Mullins; Mike Clayton; Mike Wheelock; Natalie Welter; Nicole Arnold; Paul Kallio; Randy Foster; Randy Sacco; Rich Bundy; Roman Lynch; Ron Mowers; Russ Laczniak; Rusty Hutchison; Sara Lehman; Skunk River Cycles; Stacey Roberts; Stephanie Cutler; Steve Bobenhouse; Tiffany Butler; Tim Moran; Tim Rasmussen; Timothy Fencl; Timothy Gartin; Tom Schultz; William Pattinson
Subject: VardoGram

Mrs. Dr. Jeff (Katie) Bradshaw Asks: Is This Brother Mullins?

See attached picture.

(The Editor Asks: Just what type of unsavory magazines and/or websites is Mrs. Dr. Jeff (Katie) Bradshaw subscribing to these days? And, if it is indeed Mullins, what's up with the vest?)

Bill Schmitt's New Truck

Heated seats. Heated mirrors. Heated windshield washer fluid. Friends, the damned thing will even re-heat your El Azteca leftovers with the onboard microwave. One flaw The Bill did point out to me was an annoying noise coming from the back seat periodically.  He and I discovered that it was actually The Jan.

Group Runs / Activities This Week

Sunday:           A birthday: Heather Greenlee
Monday:          A birthday:   Tim Gartin
Tuesday:         A Group Run: 5:30 PM at the Vardaman Center with your RouteMaster, Frosty the . . . err. ... Katie Larson
Wednesday:   A top of the line Blu-Ray player, 42-inch high def plasma screen TV, Bose surround sound speaker system, and you're watching Gilligan's Island re-runs.
Thursday:        5:30 PM Group Run - Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts
Saturday:        Red Flannel Run - Des Moines
Saturday:        Group Run - Your RouteMaster: Nurse Franken

VardoGram

2010-02-09T10:42:00.000-06:00

Mrs. Dr. Jeff (Katie) Bradshaw Asks: Is This Brother Mullins?

VardoGram

2010-02-02T10:16:00.000-06:00

Dan Yell

The other day, I was trying to remember why we booted Danielle out of Team Vardo and shipped her off to the west coast. Then, she sends this reply to Brother Mullins regarding last Saturday's Group Run, and it all comes back to me . . . . sigh . . . . .. :

"It's 55 degrees today in Seattle and the sun is peeking out. Anyone who wants to do a group run out here tomorrow is more than welcome :-)" Danielle Wain

Thursday Night Group Runs

Good news, boys. Beginning this week and continuing until the end of winter (assuming there is an end to this winter . .) there will be group runs on both Tuesday and Thursday evenings at 5:30 PM, all starting at the Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts. When it gets a bit lighter out at 5:30 PM, Thursday group runs move to Ada Hayden Heritage Memorial Ga Ga Park. Listen to NOAA Weather Radio for further announcements.

Rosy Cheeks 5K

This Saturday - Story City. Mayor Moran in charge of Pancake Control Don't miss this one, Aunt Jemima.

Group Runs / Activities This Week

Tuesday: 5:30 PM Group Run - Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts. Your RouteMaster: Barb Wheelock

Wednesday: I'm going to spend the rest of my life hunting down whoever decided to introduce self-service checkouts without bothering to find out if they actually work.
Thursday: 5:30 PM Group Run - Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts.

Saturday: Rosy Cheeks 5K - Story City. Or, if you prefer, a Group Run with RouteMasters William Q. and Jan Z. Schmitt (?)

Saturday: A Birthday: Beth Henriksen. (Cards may be sent to her attention at the Bickford Cottage.)
Sunday: A Birthday: Heather Greenlee. (Cards may be sent to her attention at The Lucky Q) (Who is Heather Greenlee?) (Anybody remember the Lucky Q?)

RE: VardoGram

2010-01-26T10:15:00.000-06:00

Oh my goodness – I’m routemaster! That’s exciting. My sister is having twins today. I may or may not be there tonight so ask if this doesn’t make sense.

Let’s take Lincoln way to Sheldon. Sheldon curved around past the cemetery, through campus to stange. Stange north to 13^th. 13^th to whatever road you want to bring back. Northwestern for less distance, duff for more distance. J

903 North Second Street | Ames, IA 50010

421 Southwest 8^th Street | Des Moines, IA 50309

p:515-232-6710 | f:515-232-8781 | c:515-290-3260

Click on the logo above to be directed to the website.

From: George Klotzbach [mailto:vardogram@gmail.com]
Sent: Tuesday, January 26, 2010 10:03 AM
To: Adam Foley; Amy Hutchison; Andrew Ryder; Art Barton; Barbara Wheelock; Benjamin Anderson; Beth Henriksen; Bill Schmitt; Bob Watson; Brendan Finn; Carver Nebbe; Chris Delaney; Christine Keenan; Cori Peterson; Craig Walter; Danielle Wain; Dave Elsenbast; Deborah Martinez; Del Weiss; Don Muff; Eric Esser; Erik Roys; Erin Pederson; Eve Wurtele; George J. Klotzbach; Greg Wool; Heather Greenlee; Hillary Olson; Jamile Shirley; Jan L Schmitt; Jeff Margrett; Jeffrey Bradshaw; Jenn Schaeffer; Jennifer York; Jody Gatewood; John Moran; Jonathan Wendel; Joyce Hagley; Julie Vardaman; Karen Klotzbach; Kathy Laczniak; Katie Bradshaw; Katie Larsen; Kecia Goodman; Kimberly Donner; Kirsten Peterson; Kori Heuss; Kris Franken; Laura C Merrick; Linda Lehman; Lisa Lann; Lisa Wehr; Margaret Epplin; Margaret Epplin (Home); Mary Schrunk; Megan Colvin; Michael Mullins; Mike Clayton; Mike Wheelock; Natalie Welter; Nicole Arnold; Paul Kallio; Randy Foster; Randy Sacco; Rich Bundy; Roman Lynch; Ron Mowers; Russ Laczniak; Rusty Hutchison; Sara Lehman; Skunk River Cycles; Stacey Roberts; Stephanie Cutler; Steve Bobenhouse; Tiffany Butler; Tim Moran; Tim Rasmussen; Timothy Fencl; Timothy Gartin; Tom Schultz; William Pattinson
Cc: todd@haverkamp-properties.com
Subject: VardoGram

Here's Our Favorite Attorney On Duff Avenue With A Fine Message

"Todd Wuestenberg is in search of a two runners to each run 2 hours on a treadmill on February 16 at the Memorial Union. This is to help raise funds for the Emergency Relief Project (i.e., the homeless shelter). Please contact Todd (todd@haverkamp-properties.com) if you are interested." Tim Gartin

Profiles In VardoCourage

This week's winner: Linda Lehman, who ran IN THE RAIN and ON THE ICE on Saturday WITHOUT YAKTRAX. She is now a man. A Leh Man. Get it? Thank me.

Group Runs / Activities This Week

Tuesday: 5:30 PM Group Run - Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts. Your RouteMaster: Kori Heuss

Wednesday: If you're going to Cub Foods, can you pick me up a copy of Soap Opera Digest and a big jar of black olives? You're a star.

Thursday: 5:30 PM Group Run - Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts. No RouteMaster. We don't need no stinkin' RouteMaster.

Saturday: Group Run. Your RouteMaster: Brother Mike Mullins

Saturday: A fine birthday: The Cougar of Coffee, Karen Klotzbach

VardoGram

2010-01-26T10:03:00.001-06:00

Here's Our Favorite Attorney On Duff Avenue With A Fine Message

Profiles In VardoCourage

This week's winner: Linda Lehman, who ran IN THE RAIN and ON THE ICE on Saturday WITHOUT YAKTRAX. She is now a man. A Leh Man. Get it? Thank me.

Group Runs / Activities This Week

Tuesday: 5:30 PM Group Run - Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts. Your RouteMaster: Kori Heuss

Wednesday: If you're going to Cub Foods, can you pick me up a copy of Soap Opera Digest and a big jar of black olives? You're a star.

Thursday: 5:30 PM Group Run - Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts. No RouteMaster. We don't need no stinkin' RouteMaster.

Saturday: Group Run. Your RouteMaster: Brother Mike Mullins

Saturday: A fine birthday: The Cougar of Coffee, Karen Klotzbach

Re: VardoGram

2010-01-19T20:52:00.001-06:00

Yikes! I hope only resourceful Vardos showed up for this evening's run
cause Art the Barton was totally absent, physically and mentally! My
apologies to all!
Art the Barton
(Note: There will be a make up run Wednesday during the ice storm for
any who were not resourceful on Tuesday)

On Tue, Jan 19, 2010 at 9:09 AM, George Klotzbach <vardogram@gmail.com> wrote:
> Our Mother, Who Art The Vardo, Speaketh
>
> "I am in no way affiliated with this event - I just got an email about it.
> Sounds fun!" Julie Vardaman
>
> Announcing an Adventure Relay Run across Iowa May 14th-16th. Join us as we
> run across Iowa from Sioux City to Dubuque in either 12 person or 6 person
> elite teams. We will be running both day and night. Start time depends on
> speed of teams. This will be a fun adventure run across the great State of
> Iowa to raise money to build an orphanage in Welkom South Africa. Visit
> www.relayia.org for details and get your team together for an adventure
> Relay like no other!
>
> Who Has The Rosiest Cheeks?
>
> Why, the Mayor of Northeast Story City, Mr. John Moran, of course. And if
> you wanna see them cheeks, you gotta sign up now for the 11th Annual Rosy
> Cheeks 5K in Story City on February 6th. I've attached a scan of of the
> entry form for your lovely convenience. Pancakes? Of course. All your
> VardoBuddies will be there. Yes they will. It's a Team Vardo Signature
> Event!
>
> Group Runs / Activities This Week
>
> Tuesday: 5:30 PM Group Run - Vardaman Center for the Performing
> Arts. Your RouteMaster: The Art of Barton
> Wednesday: Well done for sticking to your New Year's resolutions this
> far. Even if 'I will not set fire to my neighbor's Pontiac' isn't exactly a
> huge amount to ask.
> Thursday: Hey, boys, I've been out to Ada Hayden Vardaman Heritage
> Memorial Park, and it ain't too bad to run out there with them YakTrax
> thingys. I'm just saying.
> Saturday: 8:00 AM Group Run. Meet at the Klotzbach Koffee Haus
> (1411 Linden Drive) Bring guitar(s) and five dollar cover charge (Karen the
> Cougar live on stage.)

Out of Office: VardoGram

2010-01-19T18:41:00.001-06:00

I will be out of the office after 3pm today(1/19), back tomorrow.

RE: VardoGram

2010-01-19T09:55:00.000-06:00

I’ve had requests from the Monday night running group to plan Thursday night runs. While it’s still unlighted at ada hayden, meet at 5:30 p.m. on Thursday’s at city hall for anyone who is interested.

903 North Second Street | Ames, IA 50010

421 Southwest 8^th Street | Des Moines, IA 50309

p:515-232-6710 | f:515-232-8781 | c:515-290-3260

Click on the logo above to be directed to the website.

From: George Klotzbach [mailto:vardogram@gmail.com]
Sent: Tuesday, January 19, 2010 9:09 AM
To: Adam Foley; Amy Hutchison; Andrew Ryder; Art Barton; Barbara Wheelock; Benjamin Anderson; Beth Henriksen; Bill Schmitt; Bob Watson; Brendan Finn; Carver Nebbe; Chris Delaney; Christine Keenan; Cori Peterson; Craig Walter; Danielle Wain; Dave Elsenbast; Deborah Martinez; Del Weiss; Don Muff; Eric Esser; Erik Roys; Erin Pederson; Eve Wurtele; George J. Klotzbach; Greg Wool; Heather Greenlee; Hillary Olson; Jamile Shirley; Jan L Schmitt; Jeff Margrett; Jeffrey Bradshaw; Jenn Schaeffer; Jennifer York; Jody Gatewood; John Moran; Jonathan Wendel; Joyce Hagley; Julie Vardaman; Karen Klotzbach; Kathy Laczniak; Katie Bradshaw; Katie Larsen; Kecia Goodman; Kimberly Donner; Kirsten Peterson; Kori Heuss; Kris Franken; Laura C Merrick; Linda Lehman; Lisa Lann; Lisa Wehr; Margaret Epplin; Margaret Epplin (Home); Mary Schrunk; Megan Colvin; Michael Mullins; Mike Clayton; Mike Wheelock; Natalie Welter; Nicole Arnold; Paul Kallio; Randy Foster; Randy Sacco; Rich Bundy; Roman Lynch; Ron Mowers; Russ Laczniak; Rusty Hutchison; Sara Lehman; Skunk River Cycles; Stacey Roberts; Stephanie Cutler; Steve Bobenhouse; Tiffany Butler; Tim Moran; Tim Rasmussen; Timothy Fencl; Timothy Gartin; Tom Schultz; William Pattinson
Subject: VardoGram

Our Mother, Who Art The Vardo, Speaketh

"I am in no way affiliated with this event - I just got an email about it. Sounds fun!" Julie Vardaman

Announcing an Adventure Relay Run across Iowa May 14th-16th. Join us as we run across Iowa from Sioux City to Dubuque in either 12 person or 6 person elite teams. We will be running both day and night. Start time depends on speed of teams. This will be a fun adventure run across the great State of Iowa to raise money to build an orphanage in Welkom South Africa. Visit www.relayia.org for details and get your team together for an adventure Relay like no other!

Who Has The Rosiest Cheeks?

Why, the Mayor of Northeast Story City, Mr. John Moran, of course. And if you wanna see them cheeks, you gotta sign up now for the 11th Annual Rosy Cheeks 5K in Story City on February 6th. I've attached a scan of of the entry form for your lovely convenience. Pancakes? Of course. All your VardoBuddies will be there. Yes they will. It's a Team Vardo Signature Event!

Group Runs / Activities This Week

Tuesday: 5:30 PM Group Run - Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts. Your RouteMaster: The Art of Barton

Wednesday: Well done for sticking to your New Year's resolutions this far. Even if 'I will not set fire to my neighbor's Pontiac' isn't exactly a huge amount to ask.

Thursday: Hey, boys, I've been out to Ada Hayden Vardaman Heritage Memorial Park, and it ain't too bad to run out there with them YakTrax thingys. I'm just saying.

Saturday: 8:00 AM Group Run. Meet at the Klotzbach Koffee Haus (1411 Linden Drive) Bring guitar(s) and five dollar cover charge (Karen the Cougar live on stage.)

VardoGram

2010-01-19T09:09:00.001-06:00

Our Mother, Who Art The Vardo, Speaketh

"I am in no way affiliated with this event - I just got an email about it. Sounds fun!" Julie Vardaman

Who Has The Rosiest Cheeks?

Group Runs / Activities This Week

Tuesday: 5:30 PM Group Run - Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts. Your RouteMaster: The Art of Barton

Wednesday: Well done for sticking to your New Year's resolutions this far. Even if 'I will not set fire to my neighbor's Pontiac' isn't exactly a huge amount to ask.

Thursday: Hey, boys, I've been out to Ada Hayden Vardaman Heritage Memorial Park, and it ain't too bad to run out there with them YakTrax thingys. I'm just saying.

Saturday: 8:00 AM Group Run. Meet at the Klotzbach Koffee Haus (1411 Linden Drive) Bring guitar(s) and five dollar cover charge (Karen the Cougar live on stage.)

Re: VardoGram

2010-01-12T19:42:00.001-06:00

Hey George, wanted to let you know I saw Art at Ada Hayden this
afternoon. Couldn't have been him in DC, so cut the poor guy some
slack, he's practically a nun for Christ's sake!
Clark

On Tue, Jan 12, 2010 at 9:32 AM, George Klotzbach <vardogram@gmail.com> wrote:
> Disney Half Marathon Report
>
> "I managed to brave sleet, snow, and rain, and sub-freezing temperature to
> run the Disney Half-Marathon (yes, in Orlando, FL.... thank goodness for
> crummy Iowa training conditions!!!) in 1:52:35. Unfortunately, though my
> heart was in it, my stomach was not (thanks to my son for the stomach flu he
> gave me) when the time came 'round for the marathon. So Goofy for me will
> not happen this year..... got some cool tech shirts, though!!!" Randy
> Foster
>
>
> Has Anyone Seen The Art of Barton Lately? Wasn't He Headed To D.C. (?)
>
> Sister Kirstin sends a clue:
> http://www.kcci.com/irresistible/22171432/detail.html?taf=des
>
> Group Runs / Activities This Week
>
> Tuesday: 5:30 PM - Group Run. Vardaman Center for the Performing
> Arts. Your RouteMaster: The Mayor of Northeast Story City, John Moran
> Wednesday: Are you starting to feel like you're in a three-legged race?
> Tonight take one tablet not two.
> Saturday: Group Run. Your RouteMaster: The Vardo
>
>
>
>
>

VardoGram

2010-01-12T09:32:00.001-06:00

Disney Half Marathon Report

"I managed to brave sleet, snow, and rain, and sub-freezing temperature to run the Disney Half-Marathon (yes, in Orlando, FL.... thank goodness for crummy Iowa training conditions!!!) in 1:52:35. Unfortunately, though my heart was in it, my stomach was not (thanks to my son for the stomach flu he gave me) when the time came 'round for the marathon. So Goofy for me will not happen this year..... got some cool tech shirts, though!!!" Randy Foster

Has Anyone Seen The Art of Barton Lately? Wasn't He Headed To D.C. (?)

Sister Kirstin sends a clue: http://www.kcci.com/irresistible/22171432/detail.html?taf=des

Group Runs / Activities This Week

Tuesday: 5:30 PM - Group Run. Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts. Your RouteMaster: The Mayor of Northeast Story City, John Moran

Wednesday: Are you starting to feel like you're in a three-legged race? Tonight take one tablet not two.

Saturday: Group Run. Your RouteMaster: The Vardo

RE: VardoGram

2010-01-05T10:21:00.000-06:00

Friends, Romans, Vardaman:

Upon reviewing the saturday morning weather forecast (-15 ambient air temp. with wind chill in the -25 to -30 range), I too am invoking Section 6, subsection ii, paragraph 2 of the Vardo Bylaws (thanks for the reference, Adam!) Saturday's run is herewith cancelled in the interest of your personal safety.

A suggestion: Several of the Vardos have memberships to Ames Racquet and Fitness -- perhaps we could all plan to converge at the north club at, say, 8:00 a.m. and kick all the "New Years Resolution" runners off the treadmills so we can get a "group" run in. (If memory serves me, they have 16 treadmills) If non-ARF members are interested, they should find a member and come as their guest -- it's a $10 charge, but that beats the snot out of the $11,000 hospital bill for treating your frostbite. In lieu of routemaster responsibilities, I would be willing to help play "matchmaker" between members and non-members -- just e-mail me if you plan to attend on Saturday morning and your status as a member.

Stay safe -- live to run another day!

Rich

________________________________
From: George Klotzbach [vardogram@gmail.com]
Sent: Tuesday, January 05, 2010 9:43 AM
To: Adam Foley; Amy Hutchison; Andrew Ryder; Art Barton; Barbara Wheelock; Anderson, Benjamin; Beth Henriksen; Bill Schmitt; Bob Watson; Brendan Finn; Carver Nebbe; Chris Delaney; Christine Keenan; Cori Peterson; Craig Walter; Danielle Wain; Dave Elsenbast; Deborah Martinez; Del Weiss; Don Muff; Eric Esser; Erik Roys; Erin Pederson; Wurtele, Eve; George J. Klotzbach; Greg Wool; Greenlee, Mary; Hillary Olson; Jamile Shirley; Jan L Schmitt; Jeff Margrett; Jeffrey Bradshaw; Jenn Schaeffer; Jennifer York; Jody Gatewood; John Moran; Wendel, Jonathan; Joyce Hagley; Julie Vardaman; Karen Klotzbach; Kathy Laczniak; Katie Bradshaw; Katie Larsen; Kecia Goodman; Kimberly Donner; Kirsten Peterson; Kori Heuss; Kris Franken; Laura C Merrick; Linda Lehman; Lisa Lann; Lisa Wehr; Margaret Epplin; Margaret Epplin (Home); Mary Schrunk; Megan Colvin; Michael Mullins; Mike Clayton; Mike Wheelock; Natalie Welter; Nicole Arnold; Paul Kallio; Randy Foster; Randy Sacco; Rich Bundy; Roman Lynch; Ron Mowers; Laczniak, Russell; Rusty Hutchison; Sara Lehman; Skunk River Cycles; Stacey Roberts; Stephanie Cutler; Steve Bobenhouse; Tiffany Butler; Tim Moran; Tim Rasmussen; Timothy Fencl; Timothy Gartin; Tom Schultz; William Pattinson
Subject: VardoGram

The Sledding Of Madison County - Picture Attached

"Just when you thought you had seen it all; but wait, it is the Gentle Gardener's Redneck family sledding on Christmas! Yup, it be a flat-bottomed boat-pulled by a tractor! (But who's asking right?) The snow was too deep so the sleds all sank. My brother got out his big Allis Chalmers and fixed everything the Madison-County way. Just a snowball's throw from Arkansas really." Mary Schrunk

Chris Keenan: Rock Star

Sister Goodman reporteth thusly: "Congratulations to our very own Chris Keenan for her outstanding hard work and luck (it was after all a drawing)!! Check out Chris at the website http://www.flatlandseries.com/blog/ as she completes the swim portion of the Copper Creek Triathlon (You may have to scroll down a bit)!! Way to go Chris!!" Sister Goodman

Adam Invokes Rare Vardo Bylaw For Tonight's Group Run

"So does this cold constitute our "run indoors rule"? I'm not sure on the details of said rule, in conjunction with the Vardo Bylaws- section 6, subsection ii, paragraph 2?" Adam Foley
(Editor's Note: Yes.)

Group Runs / Activities This Week

Tuesday: 5:30 PM - Ernest Shackelton returns to the Quest with yet another 10 pound bag of Kwik Shop ice and a case of Fat Tire. Declares no group run tonight for the crew.
Wednesday: That big box still under the tree smells kinda funny and the dog won't leave it alone. Are you sure you want to unwrap it in front of the family?
Thursday: A birthday: The artist formerly known as Jamile Shirley
Saturday: Group Run. Your RouteMaster is Sir Rich Bundy

VardoGram

2010-01-05T09:43:00.001-06:00

The Sledding Of Madison County - Picture Attached

Chris Keenan: Rock Star

Adam Invokes Rare Vardo Bylaw For Tonight's Group Run

"So does this cold constitute our "run indoors rule"? I'm not sure on the details of said rule, in conjunction with the Vardo Bylaws- section 6, subsection ii, paragraph 2?" Adam Foley

(Editor's Note: Yes.)

Group Runs / Activities This Week

Tuesday: 5:30 PM - Ernest Shackelton returns to the Quest with yet another 10 pound bag of Kwik Shop ice and a case of Fat Tire. Declares no group run tonight for the crew.

Wednesday: That big box still under the tree smells kinda funny and the dog won't leave it alone. Are you sure you want to unwrap it in front of the family?

Thursday: A birthday: The artist formerly known as Jamile Shirley

Saturday: Group Run. Your RouteMaster is Sir Rich Bundy

Re: VardoGram: Early Edition

2009-12-30T13:57:00.001-06:00

Ames Area runn8ing club invites you to

The January Frozen Foot Run is upon us January 1. The social run will be held at 9AM at the State Tree Nursery, south of the fire station at Duff & Airport Road. One, three, and six-mile routes. Grub of some sort will be served. As usual, bring three bucks to help defray costs. Bring several guests, too.

****Mike cannot send emails right now. Please forward this to runners that you know.

We have chili and champagne

Roman

----- Original Message -----

From: Kecia Goodman

To: Adam Foley ; Amy Hutchison ; Andrew Ryder ; Art Barton ; Barbara Wheelock ; Benjamin Anderson ; Beth Henriksen ; Bill Schmitt ; Bob Watson ; Brendan Finn ; Carver Nebbe ; Chris Delaney ; Christine Keenan ; Cori Peterson ; Craig Walter ; Danielle Wain ; Dave Elsenbast ; Deborah Martinez ; Del Weiss ; Don Muff ; Eric Esser ; Erik Roys ; Erin Pederson ; Eve Wurtele ; George J. Klotzbach ; Greg Wool ; Heather Greenlee ; Hillary Olson ; Jamile Shirley ; Jan L Schmitt ; Jeff Margrett ; Jeffrey Bradshaw ; Jenn Schaeffer ; Jennifer York ; Jody Gatewood ; John Moran ; Jonathan Wendel ; Joyce Hagley ; Julie Vardaman ; Karen Klotzbach ; Kathy Laczniak ; Katie Bradshaw ; Katie Larsen ; Kimberly Donner ; Kirsten Peterson ; Kori Heuss ; Kris Franken ; Laura C Merrick ; Linda Lehman ; Lisa Lann ; Lisa Wehr ; Margaret Epplin ; Mary Schrunk ; Megan Colvin ; Michael Mullins ; Mike Clayton ; Mike Wheelock ; Natalie Welter ; Nicole Arnold ; Paul Kallio ; Randy Foster ; Randy Sacco ; Rich Bundy ; Roman Lynch ; Ron Mowers ; Russ Laczniak ; Rusty Hutchison ; Sara Lehman ; Skunk River Cycles ; Stacey Roberts ; Stephanie Cutler ; Steve Bobenhouse ; Tiffany Butler ; Tim Moran ; Tim Rasmussen ; Timothy Fencl ; Timothy Gartin ; Tom Schultz ; William Pattinson ; George Klotzbach

Sent: Tuesday, December 29, 2009 7:03 PM

Subject: Re: VardoGram: Early Edition

As I am route master this Saturday, here is the route:

Find someplace indoor to run as -10 degrees Fahrenheit without windchill is too cold to run outside. Please see Vardo Laws that state group runs will cease to exist when the temperature drops below 0 degrees Fahrenheit.

Happy New Year!!

Kecia

--- On Sun, 12/27/09, George Klotzbach <vardogram@gmail.com> wrote:

From: George Klotzbach <vardogram@gmail.com>
Subject: VardoGram: Early Edition
To: "Adam Foley" <adamf@iastate.edu>, "Amy Hutchison" <amyhutch@iastate.edu>, "Andrew Ryder" <aryder@iastate.edu>, "Art Barton" <a.barton@mchsi.com>, "Barbara Wheelock" <bjwheels@gmail.com>, "Benjamin Anderson" <hawklan@iastate.edu>, "Beth Henriksen" <bhenriksen2@msn.com>, "Bill Schmitt" <isucui@isualum.com>, "Bob Watson" <IMTRIBOB@aol.com>, "Brendan Finn" <expon7@mchsi.com>, "Carver Nebbe" <cnebbe@mac.com>, "Chris Delaney" <cdelaney@iowasubwaydev.com>, "Christine Keenan" <crk@icsmail.net>, "Cori Peterson" <mightymsn@hotmail.com>, "Craig Walter" <craig.walter@ames.k12.ia.us>, "Danielle Wain" <danielle.wain@gmail.com>, "Dave Elsenbast" <dave.elsenbast@regfuel.com>, "Deborah Martinez" <deborahmmartinez@gmail.com>, "Del Weiss" <del.weiss@mchsi.com>, "Don Muff" <donjmuff@hotmail.com>, "Eric Esser" <blyfinn@gmail.com>, "Erik Roys" <skwrly1@msn.com>, "Erin Pederson" <pederson@iastate.edu>, "Eve Wurtele" <mash@iastate.edu>, "George J. Klotzbach" <klotzbach@msn.com>, "Greg Wool" <gjwool@hotmail.com>, "Heather Greenlee" <mheather@iastate.edu>, "Hillary Olson" <holson01@iastate.edu>, "Jamile Shirley" <jamile_c@hotmail.com>, "Jan L Schmitt" <JSchmitt@city.ames.ia.us>, "Jeff Margrett" <jeffmargrett@hotmail.com>, "Jeffrey Bradshaw" <jbradsha@illinois.edu>, "Jenn Schaeffer" <jenn_schaeffer@yahoo.com>, "Jennifer York" <jenyork9@msn.com>, "Jody Gatewood" <jody1219@yahoo.com>, "John Moran" <jrmoran@iowatelecom.net>, "Jonathan Wendel" <jfw@iastate.edu>, "Joyce Hagley" <jhagley@mail.hs.iastate.edu>, "Julie Vardaman" <jvardo@gmail.com>, "Karen Klotzbach" <karenklotzbach@gmail.com>, "Kathy Laczniak" <klaczniak@sauer-danfoss.com>, "Katie Bradshaw" <wildebeestly@gmail.com>, "Katie Larsen" <ktmlarsen@gmail.com>, "Kecia Goodman" <kecia_goodman@yahoo.com>, "Kimberly Donner" <kimberd@childserve.org>, "Kirsten Peterson" <KPeterson@iowasubwaydev.com>, "Kori Heuss" <kori@heuss.com>, "Kris Franken" <kfran86@gmail.com>, "Laura C Merrick" <lmerrick@isunet.net>, "Linda Lehman" <llehman@mcfarlandclinic.com>, "Lisa Lann" <lisa.lann@iid.iowa.gov>, "Lisa Wehr" <lmw.lists@gmail.com>, "Margaret Epplin" <MEpplin@yss.ames.ia.us>, "Mary Schrunk" <meschrunk@q.com>, "Megan Colvin" <colvin.megan@gmail.com>, "Michael Mullins" <michaelamullins@hotmail.com>, "Mike Clayton" <m.clayton@mchsi.com>, "Mike Wheelock" <wheelbrat@aol.com>, "Natalie Welter" <cessnaia@msn.com>, "Nicole Arnold" <arnoldnicole@hotmail.com>, "Paul Kallio" <Kallio.Paul@principal.com>, "Randy Foster" <runningknows@gmail.com>, "Randy Sacco" <rsacco@nadc.ars.usda.gov>, "Rich Bundy" <rbundy@iastate.edu>, "Roman Lynch" <romanlynch@mchsi.com>, "Ron Mowers" <Ron.mowers@syngenta.com>, "Russ Laczniak" <laczniak@iastate.edu>, "Rusty Hutchison" <rustyhutchison@yahoo.com>, "Sara Lehman" <sara.lehman@fnbames.com>, "Skunk River Cycles" <sales@skunkrivercycles.com>, "Stacey Roberts" <saroberts.34@gmail.com>, "Stephanie Cutler" <sacutler07@gmail.com>, "Steve Bobenhouse" <steve@fitnesssports.com>, "Tiffany Butler" <btiff@iastate.edu>, "Tim Moran" <tmoran@iastate.edu>, "Tim Rasmussen" <tim@alfredscarpet.com>, "Timothy Fencl" <tcfencl@hotmail.com>, "Timothy Gartin" <timothy.gartin@amesattorneys.com>, "Tom Schultz" <tom.tschultz@gmail.com>, "William Pattinson" <wjp6838@gmail.com>
Date: Sunday, December 27, 2009, 2:58 PM

Fellow Vardo-a Go-Go's: This week the VardoGram arrives early, as The Editor is headed to Independence and then to Mount Pleasant for a couple of days. If Cherokee could have been worked into the plan, the route would have taken in ALL THREE of the state's mental health institutions. The Tour de Lobotomy. Thank me. Now on with the show:

Tuesday's Group Run Route

Your RouteMaster is Mr. Klotzbach Your route: http://www.usatf.org/routes/view.asp?rID=319855

A Plug For YakTrax

Remember a few years ago when Danielle wore these funky things called YakTrax on her running shoes, and we all laughed at her, and called her names, and then shoved her head first into a snowbank? And then Mayor Moran got a pair of them, and we called him Moran Moron, and broke his glasses and made him run home crying? And the rest of us cool kids swore we'd never wear those stoopid TraxYakkers or whatever. Well, I have a pair now and Mary, The Gentle Gardener has them, and they are the best things since sliced beets for running on snow and ice. Get 'em at Emerhoff's and ask for the Team Vardo discount. Hell, buy a pair for you and a pair for your pet ferret. But don't buy them 'til Wednesday, because I bought YakTrax stock and my online trade won't be executed until Tuesday afternoon.

Group Runs / Activities This Week

Tuesday: 5:30 PM Group Run - Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts. YourRouteMaster: George Klotzenbauermannheimsteamrollerbach

Wednesday: Snow and more snow. The same day relived over and over again. No easy way to tell you this, but it's gonna involve an awful lot of Andie McDowell and Bill Murray.

Saturday: A birthday: Randy Foster. Ask Randy sometime about his fine vacation home in Rochester, MN. Yes sir. Mr. Randy Foster. Livin' The Dream.

Saturday: Group Run. Your RouteMaster: Her Holy More-or-Less, Sister Kecia Goodman

Re: VardoGram: Early Edition

2009-12-29T19:03:00.001-06:00

As I am route master this Saturday, here is the route:

Find someplace indoor to run as -10 degrees Fahrenheit without windchill is too cold to run outside. Please see Vardo Laws that state group runs will cease to exist when the temperature drops below 0 degrees Fahrenheit.

Happy New Year!!

Kecia

--- On Sun, 12/27/09, George Klotzbach <vardogram@gmail.com> wrote:

From: George Klotzbach <vardogram@gmail.com>
Subject: VardoGram: Early Edition
To: "Adam Foley" <adamf@iastate.edu>, "Amy Hutchison" <amyhutch@iastate.edu>, "Andrew Ryder" <aryder@iastate.edu>, "Art Barton" <a.barton@mchsi.com>, "Barbara Wheelock" <bjwheels@gmail.com>, "Benjamin Anderson" <hawklan@iastate.edu>, "Beth Henriksen" <bhenriksen2@msn.com>, "Bill Schmitt" <isucui@isualum.com>, "Bob Watson" <IMTRIBOB@aol.com>, "Brendan Finn" <expon7@mchsi.com>, "Carver Nebbe" <cnebbe@mac.com>, "Chris Delaney" <cdelaney@iowasubwaydev.com>, "Christine Keenan" <crk@icsmail.net>, "Cori Peterson" <mightymsn@hotmail.com>, "Craig Walter" <craig.walter@ames.k12.ia.us>, "Danielle Wain" <danielle.wain@gmail.com>, "Dave Elsenbast" <dave.elsenbast@regfuel.com>, "Deborah Martinez" <deborahmmartinez@gmail.com>, "Del Weiss" <del.weiss@mchsi.com>, "Don Muff" <donjmuff@hotmail.com>, "Eric Esser" <blyfinn@gmail.com>, "Erik Roys" <skwrly1@msn.com>, "Erin Pederson" <pederson@iastate.edu>, "Eve Wurtele" <mash@iastate.edu>, "George J. Klotzbach" <klotzbach@msn.com>, "Greg Wool" <gjwool@hotmail.com>, "Heather Greenlee" <mheather@iastate.edu>, "Hillary Olson" <holson01@iastate.edu>, "Jamile Shirley" <jamile_c@hotmail.com>, "Jan L Schmitt" <JSchmitt@city.ames.ia.us>, "Jeff Margrett" <jeffmargrett@hotmail.com>, "Jeffrey Bradshaw" <jbradsha@illinois.edu>, "Jenn Schaeffer" <jenn_schaeffer@yahoo.com>, "Jennifer York" <jenyork9@msn.com>, "Jody Gatewood" <jody1219@yahoo.com>, "John Moran" <jrmoran@iowatelecom.net>, "Jonathan Wendel" <jfw@iastate.edu>, "Joyce Hagley" <jhagley@mail.hs.iastate.edu>, "Julie Vardaman" <jvardo@gmail.com>, "Karen Klotzbach" <karenklotzbach@gmail.com>, "Kathy Laczniak" <klaczniak@sauer-danfoss.com>, "Katie Bradshaw" <wildebeestly@gmail.com>, "Katie Larsen" <ktmlarsen@gmail.com>, "Kecia Goodman" <kecia_goodman@yahoo.com>, "Kimberly Donner" <kimberd@childserve.org>, "Kirsten Peterson" <KPeterson@iowasubwaydev.com>, "Kori Heuss" <kori@heuss.com>, "Kris Franken" <kfran86@gmail.com>, "Laura C Merrick" <lmerrick@isunet.net>, "Linda Lehman" <llehman@mcfarlandclinic.com>, "Lisa Lann" <lisa.lann@iid.iowa.gov>, "Lisa Wehr" <lmw.lists@gmail.com>, "Margaret Epplin" <MEpplin@yss.ames.ia.us>, "Mary Schrunk" <meschrunk@q.com>, "Megan Colvin" <colvin.megan@gmail.com>, "Michael Mullins" <michaelamullins@hotmail.com>, "Mike Clayton" <m.clayton@mchsi.com>, "Mike Wheelock" <wheelbrat@aol.com>, "Natalie Welter" <cessnaia@msn.com>, "Nicole Arnold" <arnoldnicole@hotmail.com>, "Paul Kallio" <Kallio.Paul@principal.com>, "Randy Foster" <runningknows@gmail.com>, "Randy Sacco" <rsacco@nadc.ars.usda.gov>, "Rich Bundy" <rbundy@iastate.edu>, "Roman Lynch" <romanlynch@mchsi.com>, "Ron Mowers" <Ron.mowers@syngenta.com>, "Russ Laczniak" <laczniak@iastate.edu>, "Rusty Hutchison" <rustyhutchison@yahoo.com>, "Sara Lehman" <sara.lehman@fnbames.com>, "Skunk River Cycles" <sales@skunkrivercycles.com>, "Stacey Roberts" <saroberts.34@gmail.com>, "Stephanie Cutler" <sacutler07@gmail.com>, "Steve Bobenhouse" <steve@fitnesssports.com>, "Tiffany Butler" <btiff@iastate.edu>, "Tim Moran" <tmoran@iastate.edu>, "Tim Rasmussen" <tim@alfredscarpet.com>, "Timothy Fencl" <tcfencl@hotmail.com>, "Timothy Gartin" <timothy.gartin@amesattorneys.com>, "Tom Schultz" <tom.tschultz@gmail.com>, "William Pattinson" <wjp6838@gmail.com>
Date: Sunday, December 27, 2009, 2:58 PM

Fellow Vardo-a Go-Go's: This week the VardoGram arrives early, as The Editor is headed to Independence and then to Mount Pleasant for a couple of days. If Cherokee could have been worked into the plan, the route would have taken in ALL THREE of the state's mental health institutions. The Tour de Lobotomy. Thank me. Now on with the show:

Tuesday's Group Run Route

Your RouteMaster is Mr. Klotzbach Your route: http://www.usatf.org/routes/view.asp?rID=319855

A Plug For YakTrax

Remember a few years ago when Danielle wore these funky things called YakTrax on her running shoes, and we all laughed at her, and called her names, and then shoved her head first into a snowbank? And then Mayor Moran got a pair of them, and we called him Moran Moron, and broke his glasses and made him run home crying? And the rest of us cool kids swore we'd never wear those stoopid TraxYakkers or whatever. Well, I have a pair now and Mary, The Gentle Gardener has them, and they are the best things since sliced beets for running on snow and ice. Get 'em at Emerhoff's and ask for the Team Vardo discount. Hell, buy a pair for you and a pair for your pet ferret. But don't buy them 'til Wednesday, because I bought YakTrax stock and my online trade won't be executed until Tuesday afternoon.

Group Runs / Activities This Week

Tuesday: 5:30 PM Group Run - Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts. YourRouteMaster: George Klotzenbauermannheimsteamrollerbach

Wednesday: Snow and more snow. The same day relived over and over again. No easy way to tell you this, but it's gonna involve an awful lot of Andie McDowell and Bill Murray.

Saturday: A birthday: Randy Foster. Ask Randy sometime about his fine vacation home in Rochester, MN. Yes sir. Mr. Randy Foster. Livin' The Dream.

Saturday: Group Run. Your RouteMaster: Her Holy More-or-Less, Sister Kecia Goodman

Re: VardoGram: Early Edition

2009-12-29T12:35:00.001-06:00

****Mike cannot send emails right now. Please forward this to runners that you know.

We have chili and champagne

Roman

----- Original Message -----

From: George Klotzbach

To: Adam Foley ; Amy Hutchison ; Andrew Ryder ; Art Barton ; Barbara Wheelock ; Benjamin Anderson ; Beth Henriksen ; Bill Schmitt ; Bob Watson ; Brendan Finn ; Carver Nebbe ; Chris Delaney ; Christine Keenan ; Cori Peterson ; Craig Walter ; Danielle Wain ; Dave Elsenbast ; Deborah Martinez ; Del Weiss ; Don Muff ; Eric Esser ; Erik Roys ; Erin Pederson ; Eve Wurtele ; George J. Klotzbach ; Greg Wool ; Heather Greenlee ; Hillary Olson ; Jamile Shirley ; Jan L Schmitt ; Jeff Margrett ; Jeffrey Bradshaw ; Jenn Schaeffer ; Jennifer York ; Jody Gatewood ; John Moran ; Jonathan Wendel ; Joyce Hagley ; Julie Vardaman ; Karen Klotzbach ; Kathy Laczniak ; Katie Bradshaw ; Katie Larsen ; Kecia Goodman ; Kimberly Donner ; Kirsten Peterson ; Kori Heuss ; Kris Franken ; Laura C Merrick ; Linda Lehman ; Lisa Lann ; Lisa Wehr ; Margaret Epplin ; Mary Schrunk ; Megan Colvin ; Michael Mullins ; Mike Clayton ; Mike Wheelock ; Natalie Welter ; Nicole Arnold ; Paul Kallio ; Randy Foster ; Randy Sacco ; Rich Bundy ; Roman Lynch ; Ron Mowers ; Russ Laczniak ; Rusty Hutchison ; Sara Lehman ; Skunk River Cycles ; Stacey Roberts ; Stephanie Cutler ; Steve Bobenhouse ; Tiffany Butler ; Tim Moran ; Tim Rasmussen ; Timothy Fencl ; Timothy Gartin ; Tom Schultz ; William Pattinson

Sent: Sunday, December 27, 2009 2:58 PM

Subject: VardoGram: Early Edition

Fellow Vardo-a Go-Go's: This week the VardoGram arrives early, as The Editor is headed to Independence and then to Mount Pleasant for a couple of days. If Cherokee could have been worked into the plan, the route would have taken in ALL THREE of the state's mental health institutions. The Tour de Lobotomy. Thank me. Now on with the show:

Tuesday's Group Run Route

Your RouteMaster is Mr. Klotzbach Your route: http://www.usatf.org/routes/view.asp?rID=319855

A Plug For YakTrax

Remember a few years ago when Danielle wore these funky things called YakTrax on her running shoes, and we all laughed at her, and called her names, and then shoved her head first into a snowbank? And then Mayor Moran got a pair of them, and we called him Moran Moron, and broke his glasses and made him run home crying? And the rest of us cool kids swore we'd never wear those stoopid TraxYakkers or whatever. Well, I have a pair now and Mary, The Gentle Gardener has them, and they are the best things since sliced beets for running on snow and ice. Get 'em at Emerhoff's and ask for the Team Vardo discount. Hell, buy a pair for you and a pair for your pet ferret. But don't buy them 'til Wednesday, because I bought YakTrax stock and my online trade won't be executed until Tuesday afternoon.

Group Runs / Activities This Week

Tuesday: 5:30 PM Group Run - Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts. YourRouteMaster: George Klotzenbauermannheimsteamrollerbach

Wednesday: Snow and more snow. The same day relived over and over again. No easy way to tell you this, but it's gonna involve an awful lot of Andie McDowell and Bill Murray.

Saturday: A birthday: Randy Foster. Ask Randy sometime about his fine vacation home in Rochester, MN. Yes sir. Mr. Randy Foster. Livin' The Dream.

Saturday: Group Run. Your RouteMaster: Her Holy More-or-Less, Sister Kecia Goodman

Re: VardoGram: Early Edition

2009-12-29T12:11:00.001-06:00

The January Frozen Foot Run is upon us. The social run will be held at 9AM at the State Tree Nursery, south of the fire station at Duff & Airport Road. One, three, and six-mile routes. Grub of some sort will be served. As usual, bring three bucks to help defray costs. Bring several guests, too.

Mike cannot send emails so I am sending this notice to you. Please come if you can and please forward this announcement to others that you know.

Thanks a bunch

Roman

----- Original Message -----

From: George Klotzbach

To: Adam Foley ; Amy Hutchison ; Andrew Ryder ; Art Barton ; Barbara Wheelock ; Benjamin Anderson ; Beth Henriksen ; Bill Schmitt ; Bob Watson ; Brendan Finn ; Carver Nebbe ; Chris Delaney ; Christine Keenan ; Cori Peterson ; Craig Walter ; Danielle Wain ; Dave Elsenbast ; Deborah Martinez ; Del Weiss ; Don Muff ; Eric Esser ; Erik Roys ; Erin Pederson ; Eve Wurtele ; George J. Klotzbach ; Greg Wool ; Heather Greenlee ; Hillary Olson ; Jamile Shirley ; Jan L Schmitt ; Jeff Margrett ; Jeffrey Bradshaw ; Jenn Schaeffer ; Jennifer York ; Jody Gatewood ; John Moran ; Jonathan Wendel ; Joyce Hagley ; Julie Vardaman ; Karen Klotzbach ; Kathy Laczniak ; Katie Bradshaw ; Katie Larsen ; Kecia Goodman ; Kimberly Donner ; Kirsten Peterson ; Kori Heuss ; Kris Franken ; Laura C Merrick ; Linda Lehman ; Lisa Lann ; Lisa Wehr ; Margaret Epplin ; Mary Schrunk ; Megan Colvin ; Michael Mullins ; Mike Clayton ; Mike Wheelock ; Natalie Welter ; Nicole Arnold ; Paul Kallio ; Randy Foster ; Randy Sacco ; Rich Bundy ; Roman Lynch ; Ron Mowers ; Russ Laczniak ; Rusty Hutchison ; Sara Lehman ; Skunk River Cycles ; Stacey Roberts ; Stephanie Cutler ; Steve Bobenhouse ; Tiffany Butler ; Tim Moran ; Tim Rasmussen ; Timothy Fencl ; Timothy Gartin ; Tom Schultz ; William Pattinson

Sent: Sunday, December 27, 2009 2:58 PM

Subject: VardoGram: Early Edition

Fellow Vardo-a Go-Go's: This week the VardoGram arrives early, as The Editor is headed to Independence and then to Mount Pleasant for a couple of days. If Cherokee could have been worked into the plan, the route would have taken in ALL THREE of the state's mental health institutions. The Tour de Lobotomy. Thank me. Now on with the show:

Tuesday's Group Run Route

Your RouteMaster is Mr. Klotzbach Your route: http://www.usatf.org/routes/view.asp?rID=319855

A Plug For YakTrax

Remember a few years ago when Danielle wore these funky things called YakTrax on her running shoes, and we all laughed at her, and called her names, and then shoved her head first into a snowbank? And then Mayor Moran got a pair of them, and we called him Moran Moron, and broke his glasses and made him run home crying? And the rest of us cool kids swore we'd never wear those stoopid TraxYakkers or whatever. Well, I have a pair now and Mary, The Gentle Gardener has them, and they are the best things since sliced beets for running on snow and ice. Get 'em at Emerhoff's and ask for the Team Vardo discount. Hell, buy a pair for you and a pair for your pet ferret. But don't buy them 'til Wednesday, because I bought YakTrax stock and my online trade won't be executed until Tuesday afternoon.

Group Runs / Activities This Week

Tuesday: 5:30 PM Group Run - Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts. YourRouteMaster: George Klotzenbauermannheimsteamrollerbach

Wednesday: Snow and more snow. The same day relived over and over again. No easy way to tell you this, but it's gonna involve an awful lot of Andie McDowell and Bill Murray.

Saturday: A birthday: Randy Foster. Ask Randy sometime about his fine vacation home in Rochester, MN. Yes sir. Mr. Randy Foster. Livin' The Dream.

Saturday: Group Run. Your RouteMaster: Her Holy More-or-Less, Sister Kecia Goodman

Re: VardoGram

2009-12-27T23:34:00.001-06:00

Check it out. Who wants to do this?

http://www.tricalifornia.com/index.cfm/WildFlower2010-main.htm

Re: VardoGram: Early Edition

2009-12-27T19:25:00.001-06:00

Now George, that's my "cabin up north"...... for sale...... cheap (and quite convenient to Mayo Clinic's fine floors in the Generose building if you REALLY need to finish your tour, George!)!

-Randy (not Sacco) Foster

On Sun, Dec 27, 2009 at 2:58 PM, George Klotzbach <vardogram@gmail.com> wrote:

Fellow Vardo-a Go-Go's: This week the VardoGram arrives early, as The Editor is headed to Independence and then to Mount Pleasant for a couple of days. If Cherokee could have been worked into the plan, the route would have taken in ALL THREE of the state's mental health institutions. The Tour de Lobotomy. Thank me. Now on with the show:

Tuesday's Group Run Route

Your RouteMaster is Mr. Klotzbach Your route: http://www.usatf.org/routes/view.asp?rID=319855

A Plug For YakTrax

Remember a few years ago when Danielle wore these funky things called YakTrax on her running shoes, and we all laughed at her, and called her names, and then shoved her head first into a snowbank? And then Mayor Moran got a pair of them, and we called him Moran Moron, and broke his glasses and made him run home crying? And the rest of us cool kids swore we'd never wear those stoopid TraxYakkers or whatever. Well, I have a pair now and Mary, The Gentle Gardener has them, and they are the best things since sliced beets for running on snow and ice. Get 'em at Emerhoff's and ask for the Team Vardo discount. Hell, buy a pair for you and a pair for your pet ferret. But don't buy them 'til Wednesday, because I bought YakTrax stock and my online trade won't be executed until Tuesday afternoon.

Group Runs / Activities This Week

Tuesday: 5:30 PM Group Run - Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts. YourRouteMaster: George Klotzenbauermannheimsteamrollerbach

Wednesday: Snow and more snow. The same day relived over and over again. No easy way to tell you this, but it's gonna involve an awful lot of Andie McDowell and Bill Murray.

Saturday: A birthday: Randy Foster. Ask Randy sometime about his fine vacation home in Rochester, MN. Yes sir. Mr. Randy Foster. Livin' The Dream.

Saturday: Group Run. Your RouteMaster: Her Holy More-or-Less, Sister Kecia Goodman

VardoGram: Early Edition

2009-12-27T14:58:00.001-06:00

Fellow Vardo-a Go-Go's: This week the VardoGram arrives early, as The Editor is headed to Independence and then to Mount Pleasant for a couple of days. If Cherokee could have been worked into the plan, the route would have taken in ALL THREE of the state's mental health institutions. The Tour de Lobotomy. Thank me. Now on with the show:

Tuesday's Group Run Route

Your RouteMaster is Mr. Klotzbach Your route: http://www.usatf.org/routes/view.asp?rID=319855

A Plug For YakTrax

Remember a few years ago when Danielle wore these funky things called YakTrax on her running shoes, and we all laughed at her, and called her names, and then shoved her head first into a snowbank? And then Mayor Moran got a pair of them, and we called him Moran Moron, and broke his glasses and made him run home crying? And the rest of us cool kids swore we'd never wear those stoopid TraxYakkers or whatever. Well, I have a pair now and Mary, The Gentle Gardener has them, and they are the best things since sliced beets for running on snow and ice. Get 'em at Emerhoff's and ask for the Team Vardo discount. Hell, buy a pair for you and a pair for your pet ferret. But don't buy them 'til Wednesday, because I bought YakTrax stock and my online trade won't be executed until Tuesday afternoon.

Group Runs / Activities This Week

Tuesday: 5:30 PM Group Run - Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts. YourRouteMaster: George Klotzenbauermannheimsteamrollerbach

Wednesday: Snow and more snow. The same day relived over and over again. No easy way to tell you this, but it's gonna involve an awful lot of Andie McDowell and Bill Murray.

Saturday: A birthday: Randy Foster. Ask Randy sometime about his fine vacation home in Rochester, MN. Yes sir. Mr. Randy Foster. Livin' The Dream.

Saturday: Group Run. Your RouteMaster: Her Holy More-or-Less, Sister Kecia Goodman

VardoGram

2009-12-22T11:25:00.000-06:00

Our Mother, Who Art The Vardo, Speaketh Thusly:

Tuesday night's run (weather-permitting): http://www.usatf.org/routes/view.asp?rID=307781. This is a Tour De Campus route, and hopefully the route will be relatively clear of ice. The exact route isn't important - just head to campus, run around for a bit, then head back! Julie

Our Cori, Who Art A Peterson, Speaketh Thusly:

Please share the attached PDF with the rest of the group! I did the My Y Tri in January 2009 and it was a lot of fun! Cori

Group Runs / Activities This Week

Tuesday: 5:30 PM Group Run - Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts. Your RouteMaster: Notre Mère - Le Vardeaux

Wednesday: We meet for lunch at The Cafe, where we enjoy a fine plate of alphabetti spaghetti that spells out "You are a sex tart."

Saturday: Group Run. Your RouteMaster: We have no RouteMaster (No Zach Goines anymore). Panic sets in amongst The Nation of Vardo. Volunteers?

RE: VardoGram

2009-12-15T12:08:00.000-06:00

HI everyone! Several of us run on Monday nights at 5:30 and I send the meeting place out on Monday morning. If you are interested in being in the Monday night group, send me an email so I can make sure you are included.

903 North Second Street | Ames, IA 50010

421 Southwest 8^th Street | Des Moines, IA 50309

p:515-232-6710 | f:515-232-8781 | c:515-290-3260

Click on the logo above to be directed to the website.

From: George Klotzbach [mailto:vardogram@gmail.com]
Sent: Tuesday, December 15, 2009 9:50 AM
To: Adam Foley; Amy Hutchison; Andrew Ryder; Art Barton; Barbara Wheelock; Benjamin Anderson; Beth Henriksen; Bill Schmitt; Bob Watson; Brendan Finn; Carver Nebbe; Chris Delaney; Christine Keenan; Cori Peterson; Craig Walter; Danielle Wain; Dave Elsenbast; Deborah Martinez; Del Weiss; Don Muff; Eric Esser; Erik Roys; Erin Pederson; Eve Wurtele; George J. Klotzbach; Greg Wool; Heather Greenlee; Hillary Olson; Jamile Shirley; Jan L Schmitt; Jeff Margrett; Jeffrey Bradshaw; Jenn Schaeffer; Jennifer York; Jody Gatewood; John Moran; Jonathan Wendel; Joyce Hagley; Julie Vardaman; Karen Klotzbach; Kathy Laczniak; Katie Bradshaw; Katie Larsen; Kecia Goodman; Kimberly Donner; Kirsten Peterson; Kori Heuss; Kris Franken; Laura C Merrick; Linda Lehman; Lisa Wehr; Margaret Epplin; Mary Schrunk; Megan Colvin; Michael Mullins; Mike Clayton; Mike Wheelock; Natalie Welter; Nicole Arnold; Paul Kallio; Randy Foster; Randy Sacco; Rich Bundy; Roman Lynch; Ron Mowers; Russ Laczniak; Rusty Hutchison; Sara Lehman; Skunk River Cycles; Stacey Roberts; Stephanie Cutler; Steve Bobenhouse; Tiffany Butler; Tim Moran; Tim Rasmussen; Timothy Fencl; Timothy Gartin; Tom Schultz; William Pattinson
Subject: VardoGram

Today's Top Story? Tonight's Group Run

And here's Sister Goodman with the details:

Here are the routes for tonight's run. I have a 4 mile route and a 6 mile route available for those who are brave (or crazy...I'm not sure) to fight the VERY COLD temperatures. I will not be in attendance for the outdoor run, but will choose to run on the treadmill (aka - dreadmill) instead. Please be safe as I have noticed that many of the sidewalks have not yet been cleared. I tried to choose roads that are not as heavily traveled so you may be able to run in the road.

Those wishing to attend the nutrition clinic at city hall after the run (starting at 6:30) should think about doing the 4 mile route and changing into warm clothes so you don't shiver for the 1.5 hour nutrition clinic (If you don't change clothes, you may turn blue from lack of heat. Change into WARM clothes!!). I went to the nutrition clinic in Des Moines about 1 month ago and highly recommend this clinic to all of you!! I will see you at the nutrition clinic (it was so good, I am going again)!!

Frigid 4 miler:

http://www.usatf.org/routes/view.asp?rID=340131

Frigid 6 miler:

http://www.usatf.org/routes/view.asp?rID=340132

Did Someone Say Nutrition Clinic?

Why, yes they did. And here's a fine Message From Our Mother, Who Art The Vardo:

I hope to see you all at the Zoom Performance Nutrition Clinic TONIGHT after the run!

Topic: Off-Season Nutrition for Athletes

Location: Multi-Purpose Room at the Community Center

Time: 6:30-8 PM

Cost: $20 - you can pay at the event!

Team Vardo Most Excellent Annual Holiday Awards Banquet

Yes, indeed. Friday night, 5: 30 PM at the Pizza Ranch. Pay at the door, head to el Party Room, and be a Vardo. (Don't be a Tiger.) Bring your white elephant gift, your 2009 medals, your extra schwag / clothing for the Free Schwag / Clothing Table, your 2009 race stories, and a clean pair of underpants. Kori has some "achievement" certificates to be awarded, and Professor Schultz promises yet another fine multimedia presentation. (Have you e-mailed your 2009 pictures to the Professor yet??) We'll dine on pizza, salad, chicken, ribs, hot dish, lutefisk, sauerbraten, kolaches, hell, it'll be just like Thanksgiving at your Aunt Mildred's house in Grundy Center.

Speaking Of Professor Schultz . . .

"Through the grace of Sister Goodman, our new calendar for the next 6 months has been made. Through the wisdom of the Professor, it is online, and through the expediency and goodwill of The Klotzbach so shall the link be taken to the masses. The link and new calendar is now on the Team Vardo web site. Amen." Professor Tom Schultz, Master of Divinity and Other Holiday Treats

And Finally: A Treat From Brother Mullins

This young man, most likely a Carleton College undergrad, has what it takes to Be A Vardo: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MjiHk3IOdyk

Group Runs / Activities This Week

Tuesday: 5:30 PM Group Run - Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts. Your RouteMaster: Sister Goodman

Tuesday: 6:30 PM Nutrition Clinic immediately following Group Run. Your ZoomPerformer: Julie Vardaman

Wednesday: You've finally opened that stubborn jar of pickled beets. And we all know you hate the damned things. So we ask once again: what's going on?

Friday: 5:30 PM Annual Holiday Awards Banquet - Pizza Ranch. Schwag, white elephant gifts, pictures from 2009, awards, Harrison Barnes as our guest speaker, free bags of money, hell, don't miss this one.

Saturday: A birthday: Jody Gatewood

Saturday: Group Run. Your RouteMaster: Beth Henriksen

VardoGram

2009-12-15T09:50:00.001-06:00

Today's Top Story? Tonight's Group Run

And here's Sister Goodman with the details:

Frigid 4 miler:

http://www.usatf.org/routes/view.asp?rID=340131

Frigid 6 miler:

http://www.usatf.org/routes/view.asp?rID=340132

Did Someone Say Nutrition Clinic?

Why, yes they did. And here's a fine Message From Our Mother, Who Art The Vardo:

I hope to see you all at the Zoom Performance Nutrition Clinic TONIGHT after the run!

Topic: Off-Season Nutrition for Athletes

Location: Multi-Purpose Room at the Community Center

Time: 6:30-8 PM

Cost: $20 - you can pay at the event!

Team Vardo Most Excellent Annual Holiday Awards Banquet

Speaking Of Professor Schultz . . .

And Finally: A Treat From Brother Mullins

This young man, most likely a Carleton College undergrad, has what it takes to Be A Vardo: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MjiHk3IOdyk

Group Runs / Activities This Week

Tuesday: 5:30 PM Group Run - Vardaman Center for the Performing Arts. Your RouteMaster: Sister Goodman

Tuesday: 6:30 PM Nutrition Clinic immediately following Group Run. Your ZoomPerformer: Julie Vardaman

Wednesday: You've finally opened that stubborn jar of pickled beets. And we all know you hate the damned things. So we ask once again: what's going on?

Saturday: A birthday: Jody Gatewood

Saturday: Group Run. Your RouteMaster: Beth Henriksen